Comedy Column: Kaleel’s Last Ride

LinkedIn announced that they would be giving their employees a paid week off beginning April 5 as “an opportunity to unplug, recharge and avoid burnout.” Management made the decision after noticing a shift in employee sentiment following months of working from home. Crazy how an international company gets spring break and we only get two mental health days. Looks like Hilary’s LinkedOut.

Bitcoin has recently been overshadowed by competitor cryptocurrency Ethereum, reaching a record high of just over $2,900. Ethereum’s rapid growth came from its use as the cryptocurrency of choice for purchasing “non-fungible tokens” — essentially digital collectors items. The only common thread I see is daddy Elon lining his pockets from peoples’ purchasing of intangible goods.

In an impromptu TMZ interview, Caitlyn Jenner told a reporter she is opposed to transgender women competing in women’s sports. In a tweet following the interview, Jenner stated: “It’s an issue of fairness and we need to protect girls’ sports in our schools.” Talk about Friendly Fire.

Gwenyth Paltrow recently announced that she will be hosting a “goop cruise” in 2022, after the original was cancelled after travelers were trapped on ships following the emergence of COVID-19. Described only as a “health and wellness cruise,” Paltrow said she would reveal more details in the future

Take 1: The cruise ship is set to sail through the bermuda triangle. So much for concealing the pyramid scheme.

Take 2: Sounds like sunken pores and cost-fallacies all around!!

A Mali woman recently shocked doctors after giving birth to nine babies; her previous ultrasounds indicated there were only seven. Doctors indicated that all nine — five girls and four boys — and their mother were all healthy.Now that’s a mother’s day to remember.

This past Wednesday, President Biden announced a $1.8 trillion infrastructure package launched to support paid family leave, education and child care. The plan is also aimed at reversing the ‘she-session’, where the current economic recession involves mostly women in the workforce becoming unemployed during the pandemic. SHEESH

In a recent interview, Hillary Clinton sat down with CNN journalist Fareed Zakaria to grade President Biden’s first 100 days. The verdict:

Take 1: A for afford this F&#%**ing Rent

Take 2:  A for airstrikes and oil-rich-middle eastern countries.