Time magazine reported that Pope Francis has formally approved allowing priests to bless same-sex couples. The ruling — released on Dec. 18 — also stated that marriage is a lifelong sacrament between a man and a woman.
This harkens back to 2021, when the Vatican’s Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith said, “God cannot bless sin,” in reference to same-sex unions.
So the Catholic Church can bless “sin” as long as those partaking in said “sin” do not want to get married?
That makes about as much sense as a screen door on a submarine, if you ask me.
Police in Morocco have seized 1.488 metric tons (3,280 pounds) of cocaine in a joint operation with Spanish security forces.
The cocaine was found concealed in banana boxes inside a shipping container that was aboard a vessel originating from South America and headed to Turkey, the BBC reported.
Someone somewhere in the world is in for a big surprise when they open their shipment of cocaine and find over 3,000 pounds of bananas.
The Philadelphia Inquirer reported that Delaware River Port Authority officers have been learning elements of improv since March.
The results are already becoming apparent.
“They caught me on the train with no ticket,” said an anonymous rider. “I admitted I didn’t pay, and the officer just kept repeating ‘Yes and?’ and I ended up telling him about a few other people on the train who didn’t pay.”
Russia recently used North Korean ballistic missiles in Ukraine, according to National Security Council spokesperson John Kirby.
The first use of the missiles landed in an open field. The U.S. is still assessing the damage caused by the second launch, Kirby said during a White House briefing on Jan. 4.
I can only hope the missiles North Korea sold to Russia are up to North Korean standards.
Those standards being that these missiles couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn if they wanted to.
The Meadville Tribune reported on Jan. 9 that sewer service costs will be rising in the area.
The higher rates are meant to offset the cost of overhauling the authority’s sewage treatment plant.
Repairs always need to be made, but this feels like flushing money down the drain.
The Department of Veterans Affairs will begin funding large-scale studies of magic mushrooms as a means of treating PTSD, Stars and Stripes reported on Jan. 9.
“We’re going to keep it simple at the beginning,” said a VA spokesperson. “A simple card trick and some sleight of hand before moving onto bigger feats of magic.”
CNN reported that McDonald’s is bringing back the Double Big Mac on Jan. 24.
McDonald’s CEO, Chris Kempczinski, plans on delivering this version of the “burger at a superior value to what [customers] can get anywhere else.”
Thankfully, the money customers save when buying the burger can be put into a health savings account for future medical treatment.
Should humans kill members of one bird species to help protect another? That’s the question scientists and conservationists are grappling with right now in the Pacific Northwest, according to the Smithsonian Magazine.
The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has suggested shooting over 470,000 invasive barred owls over the next 30 years in a bid to help save the native northern spotted owl population.
Is this the right thing to do? Whooo knows?
The Washington Post reports that governors in 15 states have rejected a new, federally funded summer program to give food assistance to hungry children.
Iowa Gov. Kim Reynolds (R) said she saw no need to add money to a program that helps food-insecure youths “when childhood obesity has become an epidemic.”
Reynolds must not realize that food insecurity in children leads to higher rates of obesity. Surely it’s that simple. It can’t be that she would rather starve the children of Iowa, rather than accept federal money from a Democratic president.
Disclaimer: All quotes (except the McDonald’s one) are fictitious. We take no responsibility for any hernias that result from laughing.
